Frustrations and Affirmations

This past week has been filled with blessings with the girls birthday party, but also frustrations and tears.

I have been trying to get some assistance from our state Vocational Rehab office and so far all I have hit are walls.  They approved me for assitance and agreed to pay for my hearing aid, now they tell me they won't because it probably won't help where I need my hearing to be & they will not pay for a hearing test, I am to pay for that out of my own pocket.

They are supposed to help me find work, but they sent me to a class that just frustrated me more. It was nothing more than an
Organizational Leadership class and nothing I do not already know about job market, how to market myself, how to do a 30 second commercial for myself.  It was taught by a very nice woman with an AAS in (you guessed it, ) Organizational Leadership.

I also have an AAS in Organizational Leadership, BA in Public Administration/Management & Masters in Human Resources. The difference between us is the fact she has a job and I do not. Oh yes and I can spell and she cannot.  That is correct, the instructor could not spell.  I called her aside on the first break and told her it was really a pet peeve of mine. However, she continued making spelling mistakes and it drove me nuts!

How on earth does one get a job teaching other?  No, let me restate that comment. How on earth does one get a job teaching adults if one cannot spell correctly?  All I could think of  when she told us she had to read a book at bedtime; was that it should be the dictionary.

The first day the class size was 3 from a sign up of 20.  The lone male of the group I believe realized the class was about as worthless as I did. However, I wanted to give her a chance,. After all, she was nice and she did drive from several hours away to teach us.  On day two she mentioned her company not only presents this class, but three more classes we should go through.  There it was, the sales pitch! 

The second class was goal exploration. Hmmm, does the state really see a point in wasting their money?  I set my goals years ago when I went to college and just because I have a hearing loss and can't sit, stand, bend or have to use a cane at times to get around, doesn't mean I still don't have those same goals.

My idea of rehabilitation is: hearing aids, computer training classes, on the job training or an internship.  Not sitting days on end in a class being preached at.  Not everyone fits into the same box and DVR is trying to cram me into the same box as those who come into their offices and are uneducated, on drugs or have worked in labor all their life.   Don't do that!  We are supposed to receive individualized plans, but really we don't and that is what bothers me!  When the instructor tells you that we are NOT the norm because we have college educations, we are intelligent, we show up on time and do the work expected, then please stop trying to put me in the square peg when I belong in the octagon!

First of all, I realized the classes are NOT mandatory, DVR cannot make me go through them or deny me further assistance if I do not attend.  Secondly, I have 13 years post high school education. I took the Myers/Briggs tests, other personality tests, I started my degree in one area and decided it wouldn't work and with the guidance of great teachers and counselors honed down what I wanted to do.  Why on earth would I want to take a Goal Exploration class?  I know what my strengths and weaknesses are and I know what I want to do. I was a trainer for ten years, I have taught pre-school through senior high school as a substitute (not my chosen profession, but I am good at it), I understand adult learners.  This is definitely something that DVR has no clue about!

The other thing she kept expounding on is that in every building in our town, there are at least 5 job openings. Well, I don't know where she gets her statistics on that, but I can tell her if that were true, we wouldn't have the highest unemployment rate in our state or the second highest, because people would be working.

I told her each week, I pick a block, get dressed professionally and I get out of my car and walk to each and every business in a square block area and not one business has had a job opening, nor do they know of any job openings or has anyone interviewed me for a position.  I did however, have a funeral director keep my resume in case he hears of anything.

What I can tell her is that in the last few months, several family run businesses in our town have shut down, Famous Footwear shut their doors, pulled out and moved away, our local Christian bookstore is shutting down and a family grocery store that has been an ICON in our area closed one of their stores down completely. 

So, statistically speaking there are now more people unemployed and looking for jobs in our area with less prospects of finding work and if there were 5 job openings in each building, so many more of us wouldn't be collecting unemployment or trying to move out of this area where we might find a job opportunity.

Yes, I am happy she has a job, even if she can't spell. However, she told of paying for her own doctors visits because the job she has does not pay one cent towards her medical and I am assuming, her husband doesn't have medical coverage either, so I know that is a job I will probably would not want to apply for because I do need medical coverage.  This year alone, we have spent over $800 in medical payments and the year isn't even half over.

Her huge thing is affirmations, affirmations and more.  Find your weakness and affirm it with positive thoughts and you will get a job, you will feel better.  Affirmations are great, if you want to do them, however, I know I am a good person, I am loved by my friends and family and I do my best to help others.  Talk to anyone who really knows me and they will tell you I do not need to affirm my self-esteem or self-worth.

I believe in Jesus Christ and I get up every morning praying and go to sleep praying.  I read my bible, attend church and the grands and I do a daily Bible study/Devotional called Jesus Calling for Kids.  The other day we were reading that when you feel down, sad, can't figure something out, take a second and whisper Jesus.  It takes the negative thoughts away and brings you back to Jesus and for me, it is easy to do, easy to remember and it reminds me to be thankful for where I am today because no matter what I think, Jesus knows best.

I am not against affirmations, they work for people and for some people that is their thing.  It just happens to NOT be my thing, but my frustrations come when I am being forced to write an affirmation, being told I have to write an affirmation because it is the only thing that will take away negativity.

Hockpockey!!!!!  No it isn't, no they aren't!  What works for you may not work for me and visa versa. What makes you smile, may not make me smile. What makes you sad, may not make me sad. Not one of us is alike and I kind of enjoy life that way, I am who I am and you are who you are and I do not believe I should have to be placed in your idea of the perfect box!

If you are going to train adults, you have better know something about intrinsic and extrinsic learning. You need to know NOT everyone is in that class for the same reason. Not everyone has the same needs. While one person may be in the class because they need a job to support themselves (extrinsic needs), someone else may take the class for added knowledge (intrinsic needs), an instructor needs to figure that out pretty quickly if they are going to reach through the barriers.

Your opinions matter and I would love to hear your honest opinions.