Thursday, October 14, 2010

Titus Womens Study Continues....

Wow!  What an awesome study we had in my Tuesday night womens Titus 2 studies.  First off, a H U G E thanks to my wonderfully awesome hubby who doesn't mind staying home and taking care of the kids, dinner and house on these nights even when I don't get home until 8:30!

Our study was about respecting our husbands and how our husbands need to love us as Christ loved the church and while many men think that when the Bible states, 'wives obey your husbands,' it means literally jumping when they say jump...our group wasn't on that road!

We all agreed that the first thing wrong with that assumption is that men aren't loving their wives as Christ loved the church, they are treating them as less then themselves and that isn't what Christ wanted and it isn't what God intended when he removed a rib to make women!

By the same token, todays woman does need to respect their husband more and I simply am guilty of probably that one.  Don't get me wrong, I love my hubs to pieces, but when he makes me mad...all gloves are off and I am like a wild person.

Respect means not treating him like crap in public or in private and not going out and busting the budget because you think it is okay...but respecting his opinions and listening.

In he end we all agreed respect doesn't mean blindly following, it doesn't mean you have to agree with your husband, but after all is said and done and the dust clears, he is the one you have to live with and love and if you can't agree on an issue, than the woman should be willing to yield a bit and give in.

Example...I have a friend (no John, it really isn't me) who has an addiction to shoes and I don't know what happened years before I met her, but her husband will not allow her to buy shoes or go into a shoe store without him.  When I first met her I thought she was cracked (yes, I have an addiction to shoes, but I know it and I can go without buying them & I can give them away), if I had to wait for hubs to go with me, I would be barefoot.

But she explained she can't stop herself when she goes in and has caused them some major budget problems and it is okay.  However, one day she comes into work with new shoes...did he go with?  No, she has them hiding in the trunk of her car so he can't see them and changes them when she gets to work.

Isn't that being dishonest I asked her?  He trusts you and sooner or later he will find out and when he does...she didn't see it that way, she saw it as this...the shoes came from WalMart, only one pair...no problem!

Well, you guessed it!  That night he decides to be nice to her and clean her car out and wash it and what does he find?  His trust hidden away in a shoe box in the trunk.

To this day she tells me he doesn't trust her anymore when it comes to money and has taken her credit cards and check book away from her. Trust me, she still eats out several times a week, buys what she wants....she just can't buy shoes.

Did she disrespect him?  You betcha!  How many of us think it is okay to do little things like this and hide them? If you do, you are so wrong!

If you want your marriage to work out, respect has to be there!  You can't say you respect your spouse today and rip him a new you know what in front of his friends tomorrow, or lie to him, or spend grocery money you had for groceries but have been skimming off the top.  It will all cause discontent and unhappiness.

Today, hug your hubs when he comes home and tell him how much you love and appreciate him!

1 comment:

ryoko861 said...

Does she work? Does she contribute anything to the household other than cleaning, laundry, cooking..etc.? I would say if she worked and if there are no budget or money problems, then she should be able to buy what she wants. But if there are money issues, credit card debt, and unpaid bills because of her habit, then intervention is needed.

If she doesn't feel she has a problem, then her husband definitely has a problem.

I've got a friend who knocks her boyfriend of over 10 years in front of him and friends, and my husband and I feel uncomfortable. And I know the boyfriend feels awkward as well. It's not right.

Sometimes it's best to not get involved.